Your Best Authentic Self
We all have different versions of ourselves – the friend, the co-worker, the parent, the partner. Practicing the following powerful habits will help you to be the best version of yourself — the authentic you.
Every version of yourself is a mask you wear for the occasion. You do this to live up to other people’s expectations, to be politically correct, or so you don’t make someone angry, even though it doesn’t align with how you really feel inside. When you do this, you’re devaluing your self-worth and not being honest about who you really are.
Break free from the judgment you put on yourself. Take off the mask. Look inside yourself and start making your feelings a priority. You will find your authentic self and live a happier, more liberated life. You’ll feel honest about who you are, what you think, and how you feel. You’ll experience an incredibly freeing feeling that will keep you motivated to continue these habits throughout the rest of your life.
Be Honest
First and foremost, to begin with, you must be completely honest with yourself. This will NOT work if you deny your true authentic self. If you feel a certain way or have a particular thought, don’t ignore it. That’s your true self and you are just wearing the mask when you deny it.
Take Responsibility for Yourself
Take responsibility for who you are. What you like to eat, how much you exercise, who you hang around with; these things are up to you.
The decisions that you’ve made, that have brought you to where you are in life – they were yours too. Did you make them alone, ask for opinions, or make them with someone else? Was it someone else’s idea and you went along with it?
Everything that has gotten you to the point you are at in life right now is a reflection of your own decisions and actions and that’s okay. Own it. Face it and accept it. You cannot be the best version of yourself if you are not honest about who you are right from the start.
If you continue to blame everything on other people, you will never learn, never grow and never become any better than you are right now. If you own your decisions (good and bad) a tremendous weight will be lifted from your shoulders. The instant you own up to something, you unburden yourself. You will learn to love your true self and begin your journey toward becoming the best version of yourself.
Start Now
Don’t wait. Don’t procrastinate. Procrastination is your worst enemy. It kills motivation, stifles growth, and damages your self-esteem. Life is precious and we only have a limited time. Just hop on the good foot and go for it.
Make a list of all your strengths and positive qualities, aim for 10, and identify ways that you can apply them to your life. This is a great way to boost your self-esteem. Keep this list handy to remind yourself to use your strengths and positive qualities whenever you can.
Expand Your Horizons
Strive for improvement. Seek out opportunities to learn and grow. Climb out of your comfort zone and try something new, something you’ve always wanted to do. Don’t worry about failing. Just do it. Never stop trying. Never stop learning.
Choose Happy
Engage in activities that give you a sense of pleasure, achievement, and connectedness. Forget the rest. As hard as it may be to hear, our lives are short. Why waste our time on negative people and doing things that make us miserable? Prioritize your life so that you’re never wasting what little time you have on negativity.
Set Goals
Once you’ve found something that you want to do, picture yourself doing it, and make a plan. Set reasonable goals for yourself and hold yourself accountable to them.
Split large goals into small steps so they don’t seem so overwhelming. Celebrate each time you finish a step and you’ll feel great. The goal won’t seem so far away.
Celebrate the small victories. Focus on the positive things that have happened to you today. Every little positive thing is a win. Keep filling your “happy tank” with them.
Never Take a Shortcut
Never take a shortcut, you only cheat yourself. You miss out on the adventure and the knowledge you would have gained along the way. Shortcuts are lateral moves. When it comes to self-improvement, there are no shortcuts. You would just be lying to yourself.
Enlist Help From Others
Ask for regular feedback and accept help from others. Loved ones can provide encouragement and ideas. They can also help to hold you accountable. Never let pride stand in the way of learning about yourself. It’s opportunities like this that allow us to grow.
Forgive
Learn to forgive yourself and others. We all make mistakes and that’s okay. They’re going to happen. Don’t let your anger poison your judgment. Forgive, let the negativity go. But don’t forget the mistakes. Be grateful for the opportunity to learn from them. Use them to motivate you to improve, and be proud of your progress. You see, even mistakes can be positive if you look at them the right way.
Develop Coping Skills
Develop important coping skills, such as deep breathing and meditation, and regularly use them to help build positive mental health.
Work on practical activities to build positive mental health. One way is to use positive affirmations on yourself. For example, tell yourself, “You’re a good person”. Or, place a sticky note on the mirror that says “You’re going to have a great day.”
Learn to Flip the Switch
Whenever you find yourself thinking a negative thought about yourself, anything, or anyone else, flip the negative switch in your brain to positive. Don’t let the darkness of negativity in. It will eat away at your self-esteem and mental health like cancer. Train your brain to automatically flip that switch and keep the positive vibes turned on.
Build Positive Relationships
Be true to yourself. Be the best possible version for you, not for other people. Prioritize what matters to you (nobody else). Don’t try to live up to anyone else’s expectations.
Learn to speak up for yourself. Don’t let people talk at, over, for, or about you. Be brave. What you have to say matters. Using your voice gives you confidence.
Live your own life. Stop living by somebody else’s schedule.
If you like to go for a walk at 7 am, then go. Don’t wait for your friend who sleeps in and doesn’t want to go until 9 am. If you like to stay up late but your spouse doesn’t want to, go ahead and stay up anyway. Watch a movie or whatever you want. If you like to go to yard sales on the weekends but can’t find anyone to go with you — go anyway! Enjoy yourself. Find a deal.
Don’t wait for other people to say, “yes” to your life. Take charge of your own happiness. It’s your life.
Help Others
Some of the best feelings you can get are from helping others. It’s amazing how much helping someone else actually helps you, too. It’s quite a win-win. When you volunteer, donate, or lend a hand, you get a huge sense of fulfillment and happiness. It’s so rewarding.
Take a Break From Social Media
Platforms such as Facebook, Twitter, and now Threads give us a feeling of connection, friendship, and a sense of community. However, it can damage your self-esteem if you compare yourself to the other people on the platforms. Social media also provides us with a plethora of ongoing immediate news and information. As valuable as this is, in this age of instant gratification, it can lead to addictive behavior, as well as depression.
Practice Self-care
Be kind to yourself and regularly engage in self-care. That could mean reading a book on the back porch, curling up on the couch and watching a movie, sleeping in an extra hour or two, meditating, or practicing yoga. Whatever you feel it is that gives you you’re positive energy, your zhuzh, your mojo – do it!
Look After Your Physical Health
Eating healthy, sleep hygiene, exercise, rest, and recovery. Eating healthy and getting proper rest can have a tremendous effect on your mental health.
Exercise. Move your body. According to the US Department of Health, you must exercise for 150 minutes broken up throughout the week. This doesn’t mean you have to go to the gym. It could be certain chores around the house, or other creative ways to get moving. Exercise can lessen anxiety and depression and help you sleep better. It also helps prevent 8 types of cancer and reduces the risk of dementia (including Alzheimer’s disease). It helps prevent and control diabetes, heart disease, high blood pressure, and more. Exercise improves your overall quality of life.
Be Grateful
Through it all remember, the process to becoming the best version of yourself is a never-ending one. You will continue to learn for the rest of your life. There will be bumps in the road, that’s to be expected. But as long as you continue to be grateful for the opportunity to travel the road in the first place, you’ll stay heading in the right direction.
Love yourself, love each other, and love the world we live in together. Be grateful for the gift that is the privilege to be you.
